Dear Maggie —

My brain is melting (said in the Wicked Witch of the West’s voice)!!  The month of May makes my brain turn to complete mush – between the school events, the summer planning, the endless sporting events, and general nonsense happening; I can’t even!  I have major mom guilt for how relieved I have been with all of this rain lately.  My son has had 3 baseball tournaments canceled and 4 soccer games rained out in the past 2 weeks. I was so grateful for some quiet afternoons to catch up on the 359 projects that have piled up all around my house.  I can see the top of my dining room table for the first time in 4 months!  I have decided that my best course of action in order to maintain my sanity is to completely check out of it all!  Your column is the only “news” I can bring myself to consume; so can you fill me in on what I’ll miss if my mind is already in summer vacation mode??  Just give me the high points though, I don’t need too much info; I’m in my Ignorance Is Bliss Era.

— Swiftly Sinking Sara

Dear Swiftly Sinking–

Oh honey – you don’t need to go down with the ship. I can totally relate!  This might come as a surprise because I’m a saint, but sacramental overload is a very real thing!  Don’t tell Gwen Heithaus! 😬. You’ve got #MomGuilt over there but I’ve got #SaintGuilt in my conscience. Looks like I’ll have to sit through at least one more sacrament… my own Reconciliation!

I’m flattered though that you haven’t written my column off yet!  I can most definitely give you the skinny on what actually needs your attention. Off the top of my head, I can only think of two  big events coming up – graduation and School Board elections.

Ok first up, graduation: if you have an 8th grader… don’t forget about graduation. That’s about all I have to say about that. 

If you don’t have an 8th grader, the other big thing happening right now is the School Board election. I must admit I am a glutton for punishment, and I LIVE for election years!  In recent years, it has proved to be like a car crash that I can’t look away from.  Since I still have to wait seven more months until the big election, I’m glad I’ve got the SMOS School Board election to scratch my itch.  I’ve decided that I will focus on an election that doesn’t involve a geriatric and a potential inmate. I’m also happy to be associated with an election where the candidates don’t need to be mediated by Anderson Cooper and Andy Cohen, and to the best of my knowledge, I’m pretty sure no one on the ballot is currently on trial – except maybe for who’s the most volunteer oriented. 

I’ve been around SMOS for a hot minute and I have to say, the thing I am most proud of is the lack of mud-slinging that occurs during these elections. Every year I am afraid I’m going to see some smear campaign sign on the Lawrence fence. Last year, I was really worried I’d float down Lawrence and I’d see a huge picture of Cliff Reynolds with devil horns drawn on his face to match that mustache (I don’t condone defamation but… that was really a missed opportunity if I do say so myself).

Luckily for us, the only mud slung during this election cycle so far has been the mud slung EVERYWHERE at Day of Service. #WillTheRainEverStop?? (BTW, kudos to the Rogers’ and all the volunteers for their work. The campus looks 🔥! )

Alright, now swiftly, get on over to the Survey Monkey link and cast your votes!  There is a great slate of candidates waiting to be elected.  In the end, we will all win because each candidate is bound to bring amazing things to our school community!

— Maggie